NAME:
  Ian Whalley

SEX:
LIVING ARRANGEMENTS:
  It's all very complicated and has to do with breathing, blood
  flow, and conversion of food to energy.  I find it very
  confusing, but so far it seems to be working out okay.
  Much the same can be said of sex, in fact.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OUIJA BOARDS:
  Why on earth would I want to think about Ouija Boards?

YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOWS?
  'When rogue police attack and nature goes bad crash action
  camera VII' (just kidding).
  Seriously, anything with an ounce of production values, but
  on the whole I prefer radio.

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
  A mouse.

FAVORITE MAGAZINE: 
  They're all too shiny for their only possible use.

FAVORITE SMELLS:
  Coffee.  Gingerbread.  One particular woman.  Freshly cut grass
  on a summer evening (it's an English thing).

WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD: 
  Separation.

BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD: 
  The end of separation...

FAVORITE CD/SOUNDTRACK: 
  Divine Comedy: 'A short album about love'
  Saint Etienne: 'Too young to die'
  Lightning Seeds: 'Dizzy Heights' and/or 'Jollification'
  Catatonia: 'Equally cursed and blessed'

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE IN THE MORNING?
  What day is it?

DO YOU GET MOTION SICKNESS?
  No.

ROLLER COASTERS-SCARY OR EXCITING? 
  Both, obviously -- the former implies the latter, in this case,
  as with many other things.

PEN OR PENCIL?
  Pencil, of couse.  The wonderful feeling of being able to rub
  out what you wrote, leaving behind only virgin paper and a huge
  grayish smudge.  Fantastic.
  And none of those propelling pencils here, thank you.

HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?  
  None.
  My phone does not ring.  Like all phones made after 1980, it
  emits an irritating half-hearted trilling noise.  If I sat
  around waiting for it to ring, nothing would ever get done.

PET PEEVE:
  I had a peeve once, but it kept making a mess on the carpet, so
  we had to give to the Peeve Sanctuary.

FUTURE SON'S NAME:
  Something that won't get him beaten up at school.

FUTURE DAUGHTER'S NAME: 
  I always quite liked 'Dana', for reasons that I could never
  pin-down.

CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
  Chocolate or vanilla _WHAT_, goddamit?

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE?
  Oh yes.  It's relaxing.  Unless you count the NJTP.

DO YOU SLEEP WITH STUFFED ANIMALS?
  Only when live ones are not available.

IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON, DEAD OR ALIVE: 
  Yes.

WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN?
  Cancer.  Which has something to do with crabs, I believe --
  something which I always found faintly concerning.

WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE POET? 
  I have no idea.

DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? 
  No.  They taste like cardboard, except with more green.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
  I would be paid to play with computers, to write about the sad
  state of the world of technology, to think strange and
  wonderful thoughts about the future, and get to try to actually
  make a difference.  Oh, that _is_ my job.  Phew.

IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
  It would still be hair.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?
  Hopelessly.

WHAT IS ON YOUR WALLS IN YOUR LIVING ROOM?
  Bookcases.  Wires.  Paint.  Pictures.  The ceiling.

IS YOUR GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? 
  What a fatuous question.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SNAPPLE?
  That stuff is revolting.

ARE YOU A LEFTY, RIGHTY OR AMBIDEXTROUS?
  I don't know what 'righty' means, but I am right-handed, if
  that's close enough.

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED?
  Monste